Monday Mailbag: Will It Ever End Edition

by | Nov 28, 2016

The turkey and stuffing leftovers are almost gone, but take heart, dear reader, the Presidential Election still isn’t over, and the Florida legislature is just getting started.

It seems from the contents of the Mailbag that 2016 might be the year that never ends.

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“Please let your readers know that I asked Donald Trump to disregard my election night concession call. You can call it the “Al Gore concession revocation plan.” –America’s Sorest Loser Hillary Clinton
“It didn’t work for me, but that’s only because that snippy W’s brother ran the state of Florida and cheated me out of the White House.”-Al “The Sky is Falling” Gore

“Does anyone find it ironic that I helped steal the election for Nixon back in ’72, the recount from Al Gore in ’00, and now I’m helping to steal the recount from Hillary?” –Roger “The Human Time Machine” Stone

“Relax everybody. This is just the latest Clinton plot to raise money now that half the world is seeking refunds from their foundation. Sad!” –PEOTUS Donald J. Trump

“For a good laugh check out how I laid out Fidel Castro fan club president Colin Kaepernick in yesterday’s Dolphin’s-Niner’s game.” –Cuban-American Miami Dolphin Kiko Alonso

“Not to change the subject, but can you believe how much media coverage I’m still getting for all those lobbying reforms I launched?” -Richard “Hunger Games” Corcoran

“I’m surprised nobody has written about how you dropped a few very telling pages from your original reform plan. –Presumptive Governor Adam Putnam

“Any idea why Adam Putnam is so fascinated with page 34 and 35 of Richard Corcoran’s original reform plan?” –Presumptive Democratic Guberantorial Nominee Gwen Graham

“Isn’t it obvious? Ole’ Hunger Games has his eye on a bigger prize.”-Highly Speculative Gubernatorial Candidate John Morgan

“I’m tired of all this insider talk. I’ll just say it in plain terms: Corcoran’s trying to get to Putnam’s right to challenge him in 2018.” –Straight Talkin’ Former Politician Jeff Atwater

“Speaking of challenges, this is just a reminder that I’m challenging Blaise Ingoglia for the RPOF Chairmanship in January of next year.” –Christian “The Digital Wizard” Ziegler

“Meh…I got a few aces up my sleeve, kiddo.  And I’m not going down without a fight.”-Blaise “Big Stacks” Ingoglia

“Don’t you think Blaise has enough to deal with in the Florida House, without having to worry about RPOF?” –Donald Trump’s unofficial ObamaCare deconstruction adviser Rick Scott

Isn’t odd how Joe Gruters was all in for Donald Trump way back in 2015, but when it comes to RPOF, he’s not taking sides?” Sharon Day

Please tell Sharon Day I’m keeping my powder dry. By the way, whatever happened to all those #NeverTrump idiots?”–Rep. Joe “Golden Touch” Gruters

Here are this week’s Top Meme Submissions to The Capitolist:

gorilla-guerilla

RIP Harambe

 

Hillary Clinton’s big recount is underway in Wisconsin:

thorough-recount

 

Hillary Clinton and Jill Stein have asked for a recount. Trump has responded. But where is Gary Johnson?

gary-three-weeks-ago

 

Trump is making good on his first campaign promise:

tired-of-winning

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